How Did I Get Here: The Story of How I Became a Pelvic PT

One of the common questions that I receive after working with someone for a few sessions of pelvic physical therapy and they get to know me is: what got me interested in doing this work? What motivated me to want to work on this part of the body and have it be a main component of what I do as a physical therapist?

If you have ever encountered a problem that ended up taking over your whole life and when you finally had the opportunity to learn more about and heal yourself from it, you would want to let everyone know and help them from having those same issues.

Who Said Sex Wasn’t Supposed To Hurt?

I was finally in a monogamous relationship and it was during that time that I was also experimenting with being a vegetarian. Despite consuming what I thought was a “healthy” diet of pasta, some vegetables and lots of sugar, I ended up dealing with at least 3 years of reoccurring bacterial and yeast infections that would not get better despite how much treatment I took for the fungal and bacterial infections.

I remember after treating one infection, a few short weeks later, another infection would pop up. I specifically remember walking on a treadmill during one of my workouts at the gym and just feeling an uncontrollable itching that was just beyond annoying that I knew scratching would only make worse and not relieve my discomfort. There would be moments where right after intercourse, I had so much pain from urinating due to all of the micro tears because my delicate vulvar tissue was so raw and irritated. I had not experienced this in the past but since I had been dealing with this for 3 years, it had just become my norm and each episode of intercourse was a grin-and-bear-it moment.

Western medicine vs. figuring it out myself

My doctors were not much help and I was left having to try to figure out the ultimate solution for my situation. It was much easier for me to look at the supplements that I could take and at-home remedies for my infections than to really look at my diet and lifestyle at that time. Luckily, after doing some work such as a candida diet, decreasing my sugar intake and eating healthier, my symptoms had decreased and I was not flaring up as much. I discovered the work of Weston A. Price after doing a three-month internship at Three Stone Hearth, a community-supported-kitchen in Berkeley, CA, with a focus on nutrient-dense food and I would say that from there, the rest was history and I rarely experienced another bacterial or yeast infection again.

This was strike one for me before I really ever knew it. I thought that I was in the clear and did not really think about my pelvic health all that much until a routine Pap exam had me realize there was more to uncover.

An Unexpected Diagnosis of Fibroids

I was in a healthy relationship with my partner, I was doing work that felt way more fulfilling than what I had been doing in the past and felt that things would just keep trucking along. The summer before my engagement, I went in for a routine Pap exam and although the results of the Pap exam were normal, during the physical exam where they touch and palpate the abdomen to feel for the uterus, they felt something abnormal. I had never palpated or deeply touched my belly before with my own hands, so had no idea what they discovered.

I went in for a follow-up ultrasound and when I got the results from my doctor, I was shocked. I had uterine fibroids, a few small benign tumors that were taking up residence in my body and on my uterus. I got a little nervous when I heard the word “tumors”, but my doctor had reassured me that they were pretty common, especially for my demographic, and that they should not impede my ability to conceive in the future.

I wasn’t touching myself in that way

I had never had any symptoms that would lead me to believe that I had uterine fibroids. My periods were all regular and only once did I have a missed period that ended up coming a few days later. I was never one to cramp heavily or have pain and my periods only lasted 4-5 days. I did not think that being asymptomatic would still cause me to be more apt to get this diagnosis. But after that moment, the fact that my doctor was able to feel for these small, but hard masses in my lower abdomen and I was completely unaware was confronting to me. How little did I know about my body and I realized how vastly out of touch I was.

In the past, when I was addressing my body, it was always coming from a place where there was something wrong or that I wanted to just feel good about myself and my body. I was practicing a lot of Ashtanga yoga at this time, and my type A personality, especially when it came to my yoga practice, was to push myself to do the next hardest thing and have that feeling of accomplishment. It was rarely from a place of curiosity. However, this was just the beginning of my train towards curiosity. Strike two.

One Pregnancy Loss After Another

Those little fibroids that I was told not to worry about, became quite worrisome when I entered my first pregnancy just a few months after getting married. I was well into my second trimester and started getting severe pain in my abdomen. I was scared that something was wrong with my baby only to find out that my fibroids were also being fed off of the rich blood supply and excess estrogen that my body was producing. Not only that but some of the fibroids were also degenerating, i.e, they were breaking down. I was placed on bed rest and told to minimize my activity to help with decreasing the pain. As soon as the pain decreased, I was given the go-ahead to resume my regular activities.

Unfortunately, the biggest fibroid of them all was continuing to either grow or degenerate and was also taking up a lot of space in my uterus, essentially outgrowing my baby that I ended up with a 20-week pregnancy loss. I remember weeks and months afterward, now being able to feel that fibroid that had seemed so diminutive and unassuming beforehand now asking to be seen and heard. I could strongly feel its presence in my hands when I touched my belly and feel the empty void that was there. I know couldn’t help but feel my belly and remember what I lost. My curiosity deepened as I also looked for meaning and understanding for why and how this happened. This would continue on for subsequent short-lived pregnancies and my one full-term pregnancy that produced my daughter; I was now one to always touch my belly and look for answers which only deepened my curiosity and want for understanding.

Secondary Infertility and Holding onto Hope

I have experienced hope and these experiences eventually led me to the path that I have been on now for almost 6 years. I have a deep desire to learn and understand as well as educate so that the many missteps and tragedies I have experienced do not happen to others or at least I can help navigate them through the muddy waters towards hope.

Funny enough is that when you have experienced hope and the possibility, you hope and pray that you won’t have to suffer again. Six years after having my daughter and finishing up grad school, I was ready to try again. I felt like I had done all of the necessary work to prepare my body and I was more in tune, touching and listening, eating in a more balanced way and in a much happier place mentally, surely nothing could go wrong. Right?

Strike Three

Conceiving was not a problem for me before. When I was ready to try again, it happened easily twice over the span of two years but I had difficulty with maintaining the pregnancies and had early losses with both. Then it just stopped. It became harder and harder with no pregnancy happening at all as of recently. This has catapulted me into more soul-searching, doubling down on my self-care and owning my grief. Despite my belief that I will have another child in this lifetime, I am also slowly entertaining what it would like to also let go of that dream, which is very scary to do. It is not what I want but if it is the path that I am being led to, I will listen.

The Care That Was Lacking For Me is What I Want to Give

I have learned so much from not being given the care that I so desperately needed during all of these prolific moments in my life when it was needed the most. If it wasn’t an ear to hear my symptoms, I needed a calming energy to let me know that it would be okay. Rather than being given a prescription of medication to alleviate my symptoms, I needed someone to help guide me to the root cause. Instead of being told to just move on and try again, maybe what I needed was some loving hands holding me and my womb, allowing me to grieve freely and openly.

One of the things that I love offering to patients is healing touch. A lot of what I do as a physical therapist is to evaluate movement, prescribe exercises and provide treatments that will help one get out of pain or just feel better in their body. But ultimately what I love is healing touch and providing that to the patients who walk through my door. To be cared for and listened to is all that most people want and can be immense in the healing process.

So this is me and my story and how I got here. I am excited to share more stories with you over the next few months as they are great teachers and can offer so many lessons on healing and tending to our wombs.